


Changing The Poop

by dallonmonths



Series: Poopernatural [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-08
Updated: 2013-12-08
Packaged: 2018-01-03 23:11:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1074164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dallonmonths/pseuds/dallonmonths
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel's butt troubles come to an extreme.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Changing The Poop

“When u mom com home and make u poop,” castiel said. “That is a gr8 feelin.”

“Cas wat u talkin bout,” dean said.

“Da best feeling ever.”

“nO THE BEST FEELING EVER IS THIS LIPSTICK ON MY FACE HEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHE **HEHEHEHHEEHHE!!!11!”** Sessy said from his str8 jacket on the floor.

“sessy u lil shit stfu.” Dean said. “go play wit ur swacks elsewhere.”

“no. swacks are meant to be displayed.”

“NO THEY ARENT YOUR SWACK JUICE IS EVERY WHERE THE ROOM IS GROSSSSSSSSSSS.”

“Fine.” Sessy caterpillar scooted to the other room.

*POPOPOPOPO POP* a FLESH OF LITE BRIGHTED THE ROOM. “hello friends I am here. Omg wtf is all over this room its grosss.” Said GABRIEL. GABRIEL!!! **GABBRIEL!!1!!!! _GABRIEL!!11!_**

“WHOA MAN WTF R U DOIN HERE.”

“U GUISE R FUGLY SO IMMA MAKE U FABULOUS.” Then he changed them all to albeenos.

“gabe. Why. What the actual fuck. We’re albino now. You know the power I have. I can puke a bean at you. One single bean. With the speed of a bullet.” Cas bends over, dean is behind him. Cas adds pressure to his stomach to make a bean come out. *OGIHSDOGI* He ended up pooping a poop at dean with the speed of a bullet in the tummy. It went right through his belly button. HIS POOP WAS CURED. HE COULD POOP. HALELOO.

“ooooOOOOOoooohhhHHHH CASSSTIEELLLL!!!!!!!!!! WHHHYYYY WOULD U DO THINGG!!!???” he colpsed to the grund.

“Dean bb ill heal you with ma beans.” He adds more pressure but just ends up putting a hole through the floor. The house can not hold its weight and colpsed.

“Guys u should probably live in the woods now. Ur house is destroyed.” Gabe says.

Suddly a ferret scream rips SLOW like a saber cat rips a deer through the house. “WHAT THE HELL HAPPENEd tOOO MY LIIIPPSTICCKKK!!!”

“Oh no looks like sessy ran out of his swag. Gotta split like my dick. Goodbye friends I am gone.” He is gone now.

Sessy/sam starts aggressively caterpillar scooting out of his room, sobbing. He toils.

“ALL OF MY LIPSTICK IS GONE!!” it is not gone. It is just all over his face.

Castiel gets up from helping dean and slaps sam in the face “I smell a little bitch in my gym. Is there a little bitch in my gym?” he slaps sam again right on the cheek bones. Suddenly castiel rips away his hand, screaming like a ferret.

“OW GOSH WHAT THE HECKLE DECKLE UR FACE IS SO SHARP!” his hand was bleeding. He pooped again.

 

“i dEdUUCE THAT CAS IS HAVING POOPING ISSUES” said dnea. This was correct. Last night dean had put a dildo in cas’s’s’ss’ butt holes and now it was open like a chamber of poopy secreting secrets.

“dnae stop this flow of my butt”

“hit the showers” he slapped cas’s’s’s butt like it was fOOT BALL TOUCHDOWN YEAAAHH!!!!!! Dean threw the baby on the ground.

“dean why would you do that” samEY said

“I dId IT IN THE NAME OF SPORTS ITS WHAT ALL THE SOCCER MOMS DO”

“dean im getting out of hand this poop is getting out of butt” cas squats and scratches behind his ear like dog. The American drem.

“wELL CAS MAYBE WE SHOULD GET YOU A DIAPER U ARE JUST A FRICK BABY IN A TRENCH COAT”

Cas scoots on his butt to the bathroom “if dats what u say dnea.” So they go and do the thing and now cas is wearing a diaper.

*POPOPOPOPOPOPO* “heY just checkin up on y’alllllllLLL” gabRIel says. “WOW It STICNKES IN HERE FIRST SAMS SWAG AND NOW POOP”

“yes gabriella cas is having butt troubles so we gave him a poofy butt”

“dAts NOT MY NAME BUM BUM DATS NOT MY NAME BUM BUM CALL ME STACY BC MY MOM IS HAWT11!!1!!!”

“wOw IGNORANT MUCH UR MOM MOWS ALL THAT LAWN FoR U AND ALL YOU DO IS BRING GIRLS OVER SO THEY CAN FLIRT WITH GRAPE JUICE WOW FAK U” sammey sais.

“u don’t have to be such a lil shit u sCeNe qUeEn11!”

“its not my fault the coontails come from within so do these studded belts and knee high converse” dnea sais

“wEll I GUESS YOU JUST CAN SHIT A BLODDY DANCE FLOOR FROM YOUR ASS CANT U”

“no. not like cas can”

“well im setting your house on fire lol k bye” gabriella says and suddenly millions of ferrets emerge from the floorboards and stampede into the woods.

“WHAT THE SHIT PICKLES CMON GUISE WE GOTTA FOLLOW DEM!!” DNEA SCREAMS!!!!!

So all their albeeno selves ran into da woods after hte ferrets.

“wow so this is life for us now” sam sais. He dramatically looks into a puddle, tears dripping down his bones that bled cas’s’s’s hand. “when will my reflection show who i am insiede??? I want to be a pretty gurl”

*vroom vroom* “ow dean what the heckle deckle”

“srry samEY i didn’t hit you with my baby on purpose”

“dena this is illegal u cant have cars in forests Pocahontas will kill u”

“wat why”

“bc sHE HATE FRENCH MEN DON’T U UNDERSTAND BABY IS A FRENCH MAN HON HON WII WII BAGUETTE EIFLE TOWER”

“WOW CAS I DID NOT KNOW U SPOKE FRENCH TEACH ME DA ROMANCE LANG LANG”

“k I will later bby” dey made da drem eyes at eachother

“lol r u guys homosexuals” sessy laughed the joke at them so they stared and he stared and weird al sang that song from the bushes, lovingly stroking his accordion.

“yes samae we r and if u don’t like it u can gtfo bc gAy GUYS R HAWT11!!!!!1”

“dean. I had no idea. That. You. Were. SCENEEEEEEEE!!!!”

“sam how did u figure dis oot” dena sais

“u said dat gay guys were hawt nobody says hawt anymore this isn’t 2007 git wit it but we don’t have to because we r scene queens”

Dean sheds a tear “i WAS TRYING TO PROTECT YOU SAM”

“I DIDN’T WANT TO DISSAPOINT U SO I HID IT”

John emerges from the grund “u guys r lame I am the true scene queen” he flips his coontails over his sholder and reapplys his eyeliner 3 times.

“wow dad how did you do that show us lool 11”

“okay lol I’ll shovel u into the ground first” den he dissapured

“what” dean sais

“what” sameae saais

Then cas tap tap tappity taps them on the shulder

“pSSSSSt gUYS”

“WHAT WHAT WHATTHATHAHTHAT CNAT UUUU SEEEE WE ARE HAVIGN AN EMOTIONAL MOMENT!!!!!!??” dean screams like a ferret.

Cas cries a tear “my diaper…its full” he then sits in deans corneas.

“dean. I need to sit in your corneas too” sameaea says.

“why”

“because I must figure out who my reflection is”

“no 1 person to my corneas at a time”

“o I see” so he scoots away

“cas get oot of my face”

“k”

Cas exits and rips his diaper off, fliging it over his shoulder sam screams an “ew its on my face” then cas’s’s’s butt holes are free

The flood starts

A wave 10 times greater than that flood from noahs arc starts and destroys the whole forest

Cas’’s’s’s pooping needs are too great for this earth to handle

It was a shit storm

“CAS! “ dean screms “PUT! THIS! DIAPER! ON!” he throws it to him in a gust of wind cas slips it onto his butt

The world is safe

*POPOPOPOPPOPO* gabriella returns with all 113423454567347365 ferrets on his shoulders

“lol wtf happened here”

“we changed the poop”

Ba dum tiss

“so NOW I CAN BE A WEE BIG COWBOY RIDER YE HAW!!” cas screams and kicks up ducks like a horse would

“cas u lil shit don’t hurt these ducks”

“oh sorry”

“wheres sam”

“I am here” he says hanging from a tree limb “cas yah nastee”

“that’s not very raven of u” says gabby

“u AARENT VERY RAVEN AT ALL”

“weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell cas is the one kicking around baby ducks”

Cas squints “oooh kawaii desu so japen”

“whut” deana says

“ur sparkle eyes” cas explain “they shine like a princess sharp teeth”

“sharp tEETS???” dean says

Cas comes closer “no u little bitch I said sharp teeth”

They kiss a passion fruit kiss and dean is like whales whoa and Sammy passes oot

“I will dispose of the ferrets” and gabe leaves

Sam dean and cas are forever trapped in the shit filled forest

Thend 


End file.
